There are many details that must be made in connection with a death. It's a good idea to take care of as many of these details as possible well in advance of the death. Some details to consider:
Notify:
Doctor or Coroner
Funeral Home
Cemetery
Relatives and Friends
Newspaper(s)
Minister
Pallbearers
Insurance Agents
Musician(s) for Service(s)
Unions or Fraternal Organizations
Employers or Employees
Select:
Cemetery, Scattering Garden, or Columbarium
Casket
Vault or Liner
Clothing
Flowers
Music
Time
Place
Transportation
Cards of Thanks
Additional Details:
Vital Facts of Deceased
Legal Documents
Lodging for Out-of-Town Guests
Obituary
Necessary Addresses
Funeral Car List
People and Services Requiring Payment:
Medical Personnel
Minister
Hospital
Musician(s)
Florist
Funeral Home
Transportation
Cemetary Lot
Grave Service
Pharmacy
To Help Calculate Your Expenses
To calculate select the item(s) you want and your total appears below.
Prices are based on national averages.
Average
Cost
Professional Services (Estimated)
Professional Services Charge
$1,350.00
Embalming
$350.00
Preparation (Hair, cosmetology, etc.)
$395.00
Visitation and Viewing
$400.00
Funeral Service (Home or Chapel)
$350.00
Transfer of Remains to Funeral Home
$295.00
Hearse
$395.00
Funeral Merchandise/Hardware
Casket (18 Gauge Steel)
$2,100.00
Casket (Wood)
$2,700.00
Burial Vault (Plastic Lined)
$1,000.00
Register Book
$175.00
Acknowledgement Cards
$150.00
Bible w/case
$130.00
Flag Case
$315.00
Casket Flowers
$225.00
Average
Cost
Transportation Expenses
Limousine
$450.00
Service Car
$250.00
Flower Car
$200.00
Cemetery Expenses
Cemetery Property
$1,250.00
Graveside Service
$495.00
Opening & Closing of Grave
$495.00
Headstone Foundation
$325.00
Headstone
$1,995.00
Miscellaneous Expenses
Honoraria for Clergy
$175.00
Honoraria for Musical Soloist
$135.00
Obituary Listing
$150.00
Copies of Death Certificate (5)
$100.00
Burial Clothing
$295.00
Music
$35.00
Personal Data Form
Top of Form
Once you have made your decisions you need to let your family know about your wishes. You may also wish to place them on file with Your cremation provider, or you may simply want to provide copies for your records, or for family members.The information that is requested below may be used to provide the information that's necessary to complete the death certificate or, to place obituary notices. You'll have all the necessary information in one place. By completing this form in advance, you are saving your friends and family members from the painstaking task of going through your personal papers immediately after your death. We've provided a Personal Data Form for you to complete, let's get started:First, discuss your wishes with your family. Tell them what you are doing. Next, print this page, fill in all the information and take it to your provider of choice. Print extra copies for your files at home (don't forget extra copies for any family members or clergy who will need this information). Don't forget, this form will help you get started. You may add as many details as you would like in the last section of this form:
Your Name and Address
FULL NAME ADDRESS CITY/STATE/ZIP EMAIL ADDRESS HOME PHONE/WORK PHONE
Next of Kin
FULL NAME RELATION ADDRESS CITY/STATE/ZIP
Next of Kin
FULL NAME RELATION ADDRESS CITY/STATE/ZIP
Physician
NAME PHONE NUMBER
Personal Information
BIRTH DATE
Retired?
yes
no OCCUPATION IF MILITARY, WHICH BRANCH MILITARY SERIAL NUMBER CITY/STATE OF BIRTH
Marital Status:
married
never married
divorced
widowed
SPOUSE'S NAME FATHER'S NAME MOTHER'S NAME YEARS OF EDUCATION
My Personal Choices
Preference:
burial
cremation
Preference:
visitation
no visitation
Preference:
prerecorded music
someone singing
NAME(S) OF SONGS OR MUSICAL SELECTIONS ADDITIONAL COMMENTS Guide to Writing an Obituary
One detail that often escapes even the most thorough planner is the obituary. Writing an obituary is another thing that can be taken care of in advance. An obituary can be as basic as containing only public facts about a person's life. Their birth, family tree, their death. It can also be a very personal look at a life. Not only a summation of the public facts, but a glimpse of the uniqueness; that, when combined with those "facts," created a personality. Written by someone who is close to you, an obituary becomes an intimate view of what made you memorable to others. Written by you, it becomes your personal life's story. As much as you love someone, recalling the details of their life at the time of their death is an overwhelming responsibility. Having the obituary already written and on file with your funeral provider is not as difficult to do as you may think. To help you get started review the sample obituary. Think about your life and what you would most like remembered. Then fill out the form, and file with your funeral plans. The Obituary: Most likely the last word written about someone's life. It's also the first thing a lot of people read in the paper. What makes a great obituary? Look at the International Association of Obituarists to find out.
Example Obituary
SMITH
ALLCITY -- John A. Smith, died July 2, 1997, after a short illness.
Announcement
This will list the date, location, and sometimes the cause of death. If you do not want your cause of death listed please be certain to note this.
Born August 4, 1936 in Taunton, MA he grew up and lived most of his working life in Sherborn, MA. He moved to Allcity in August, 1995. In 1967, along with his brother Calvin, he established a home mail order business baking and shipping gourmet sugar cookies. The family enterprise took its name, Hillhaven Oak Farms, Inc., from their Sherborn home of many years. Local residents joined the frenzied family on the sugar cookie team every holiday season as the house filled with shipping boxes and sugar cookie aroma pervaded the neighborhood. Under the philosophy of "Build a little, Bake a lot", the "Sugar Crispy" flourished and developed a nationwide customer base of sugar cookie fans. The next generation of Smiths has now taken over, but John's enthusiastic spirit continues.
Biographical Information
This will tell a little about the person's life, their accomplishments, education, honors, hobbies, etc.
Surviving are his son, John Smith, Jr. and wife, Nancy, of Allcity; daughter, Janice Smith Thomas and husband, George; and five grandchildren, Joseph Thomas, Matt Thomas, Lucy Thomas Medlin, Timothy Thomas and Tracey Thomas Kelty, all of Sherborn.
Survivor Information
This is basically a family tree. List your spouse, children, grandchildren, in-laws, other close relatives you wish, and close friends.
The memorial services will be held at 11:00 am, Friday, July 10th at Allcity Memorial Presbyterian Church with the Reverend Paul Jorday, officiating.
Scheduled Ceremonies and Gatherings of Remembrance
This will give the time and location of any viewings, memorial services, scatterings or inurnments; or any other gathering you may choose.
Memorials may be made to Hospice of Allcity, Inc., 123 Main Street, Anywhere, USA 12345.
Contributions or Flowers
Some families request that contributions be made to a meaningful organization instead of sending flowers.
Arrangements are by Allcity Cremation Provider.
Arrangements
This will help ease the burden of phone calls to the family. The firm can give the day, the time, directions, or any other needed information for scheduled ceremonies and gatherings, or contribution information to florists or friends.
Write an Obituary
Print this page and fill in the blanks to write an obituary. You may wish to save this page in your records, or give it to your funeral provider to keep on file.
FULL NAME
Announcement: Biographical Information: Scheduled Ceremonies and Gatherings of Remembrance: Survivor Information: Memorials: Newspapers for Placement:
Planning in Advance
Death isn't a topic we like to discuss, but it's a conversation families should have before an immediate need arises. No one can argue that with every death, there is a certain amount of arrangements that will have to be made sometime by someone. Compiling the basic records of life like military service records, social security numbers, life insurance policies, mother's maiden name, divorce or wedding documents, etc. is an ordeal we avoid whenever possible. When death occurs avoidance is no longer possible - there is an immediate need for those records. If discussing or even thinking about death is difficult for you, start small. Have you purchased life insurance? How about a will? If you have either of these, you HAVE started planning for your death. Think about it this way, if you are having a difficult time thinking about your death or the death of those you love -- imagine how much more difficult it will be once the death has occurred. These decisions are difficult enough to make in advance. They are even more difficult for people who are grieving to make. This section is designed to help make it a little easier for you and your survivors. Start small; create a file that contains the details your survivors will need. At the end of this section there is a list of the items that will help you begin to think about and discuss the many details that will be needed upon your death. We've also included a Personal Data Form so the information that will be needed for the Death Certificate is readily available. Gather the necessary information, papers, etc. and make copies, put them in that file. Once you've done that, don't stop there. This next item is probably the most important: discuss this with your family. What good are any arrangements if no one knows they exist? Give your family a copy of your arrangements and important papers in a duplicate "Upon my death". Now you are ready for the final step. Decide which level of planning is right for you and your family. Planning your funeral doesn't have to include paying for it in advance. The next page will help you understand the levels of planning and some of the payment options available.
Paying in Advance
Funeral arrangements should be a part of your estate planning. Paying for these arrangements in advance can be handled in many ways: bank trust, insurance police, certificate of deposits, etc. These methods each offer unique advantages and disadvantages, discuss your options with Your cremation provider before the need arises for help in choosing the payment option most appropriate for your family's situation. Here are a few items you should be aware of:
Read all contracts carefully & know what you are signing
Know what flexibility the contract offers if you remarry, relocate, or rethink the arrangements
Know your right to cancel and if your state has recovery funds in case of fraud
Be certain your family knows that you have made arrangements and where these arrangements are located.
Call each firm and ask them to mail the information on their prices of services, urns, vaults, and any special packages they may offer.
Note the friendliness and "feel" after each call to use for later reference. A scale is suggested:
Cold and Unreceptive
Somewhat Friendly
Friendly
Very Friendly and Receptive
Review the materials when you receive them. Choose one or more firms to visit. Call and make an appointment.
Gather your thoughts and decide in general what you want. Get advice if you think it would be helpful. Decide on the amount you are comfortable spending.
Make an appointment with a representative from each firm you choose to visit. Take anyone you desire with you. Get a "feel" and comfort level established before you have any discussions about services and prices.
Begin by describing what you want and how much you want to spend. Ask what can be provided by the firm to meet your needs.
Discuss the options presented. View the merchandise. Ask any questions to further clarify proposed arrangements.
Tell the firm's representative that you will think everything over and decide later. It is acceptable to mention that you are shopping at this point. This lets you leave without pressure to close everything at this meeting. You will then have the time you need to think everything over thoroughly.
Rate your visit and meeting immediately upon leaving in order to have an accurate record.
Cold and Unreceptive
Somewhat Friendly
Friendly
Very Friendly and Receptive
When you have interviewed each of the selected firms, compare your shopping experiences. Put emphasis on the "feel" ratings. If you had a good feeling about a firm, it will likely continue through the cremation and other services provided for you. Price should be a determining factor as well.
Always remember: The consumer should be in control and lead discussions. If you feel uneasy or uncomfortable, choose another cremation firm.
The History of Cremation
Thousands of years ago ancient historical writings from the Grecian and Roman time period referenced both cremation and burial of the dead. Common practice in this culture was to entomb or bury the created remains. Cremation was prohibited for Christians in the late Roman period because destruction of the body conflicted with the Christian belief in the resurrection of the dead. However, most denominations today allow cremations as a form of disposition. Until 1963 the Roman Catholic Church did not allow cremation of the body. A rule change regarding this practice now permits a funeral mass to be said before cremation, if the body is present in the church. Here in the United States cremation had it's beginnings in the late 1700's. However, cremation did not become common practice until 1980. When the death of a loved one occurs, several options of disposition are available: entombment burial, cremation and burial. In the United States today, about 2.3 million people die each year and of that 26% are cremated. People's rationale for choosing cremation includes environmental reasons, financial and convenience. The process of cremation uses intense heat to reduce the human remains into small bone fragments. This takes place at a crematory. A chamber known as a cremation retort is used for this procedure. A second process further reduces these bone fragments to a fine powder. These are referred to as cremains, cremated remains or ashes.
Cremation.com Bookstore
Your cremation provider is pleased to recommend the following books. Each book distinguishes itself by providing information on topics like planning a memorial service, coping with the death of a loved one, or an insider's view of the funeral industry. You can order any of these books online from Your cremation provider, through our association with Amazon.com. We believe that anyone planning a funeral will find them to be a valuable resource. On this page you can review books on the following topics:
Featured Book:
Final Celebrations: A Guide for Personal and Family Funeral Planning
Kathleen SubletteA book that simply and beautifully lays out the options for saying the final good-byes to a loved one. It offers both compassionate support and practical information to those facing a death. Final Celebrations also has valuable, detachable forms included. Order this book View more books on planning a funeral
Featured Book:
Purified by Fire: A History of Cremation in America
Stephen R. ProtheroThis survey of cremation's U.S. history by a Boston University religion professor illuminates many aspects of the nation's social and cultural history. Today cremation is winning acceptance as a simpler approach that allows survivors to design customized death rituals particularly meaningful to them. Purified by Fire provides an intriguing analysis of changes in social mores. Order this book View other books on cremation
Featured Book:
Readings for Remembrance : A Collection for Funerals and Memorial Services
Eleanor C. Munro"My aim in gathering these readings has been to counter the isolation that visits the bereaved in our society," writes Eleanor Munro in her wonderful introduction, "to remind us all that loss is the fundamental human experience, universally shared and collectively survived generation after generation." In Readings for Remembrance, she brings together a rich and thoughtful selection of writings from a vast range of sources as well as useful indexes and suggestions for music.
